Yesterday, I was so busy enjoying Mothers Day, I forgot to write a daily post, which ruined my perfect record so far this month. Now I don’t know what to call this day, so I’ve dubbed it “Day X.”
The truth is, I didn’t enjoy all of Mother’s Day.
I enjoyed when my son Matt came over to visit. What a simple gift– just to be with him. You don’t take that stuff for granted when you’ve rumbled with a brain tumor like my family has.
I didn’t enjoy that my chronic health issues again caused me to cancel our plans to go out.
I enjoyed talking with my other son Steve, and my mom, on the phone,
I enjoyed when my husband salvaged the day by cooking dinner on the grill, while I plopped down on a lawn chair in the beautiful sun with a glass of wine and a book.
That’s life. Ups and downs and sideways and flip-flops.
Since life is that way, today I decided I have to break my commitment to daily posts.
I hate doing it. I hate setting a goal and then reneging. I wish I didn’t go public, that I had kept my intentions to myself.
But managing my health conditions and finishing my memoir manuscript are higher priorities than daily posting, and there just aren’t enough hours in the day to do it all.
Sometimes it takes more courage to quit than it does to soldier on, even though quitting still feels like crap. (Although I have a feeling as soon as I hit “publish,” I’ll feel relieved.)
There were so many other things I wanted tell you this month about how a brain tumor impacted my life. I’ll get to them eventually, just not as quickly as I had hoped.
And if I leave anything out, well, you’ll just have to buy my book.