Posts by Karen DeBonis
What fear can teach us.
As a certified chicken, this was big. I hate heights, hate going fast, and hate anything that puts me at risk of personal injury.
Continue ReadingWhat is people-pleasing? Ask a people-pleaser.
Is it possible to undo the chains of people-pleasing? It IS. I am proof–imperfect and often relapsing–but committed and successful all the same.
Continue ReadingIs it okay to tell a friend to shut up?
In the past, I’d have put my friend’s needs above my own–classic pleasing.
Continue ReadingCan shame make you sick?
I made it all about her–the babysitter.–about protecting her feelings rather than protecting my child.
Continue ReadingNovember 2022 Newsletter
Why expose myself like this? Because when I share my truth, other women (and an occasional male) reach out to me to tell me they feel heard, that they learn. It’s why I wrote my memoir. It’s my purpose.
Continue ReadingOctober 2022 Newsletter
Dear Friend, Last month, I stopped at CVS to pick up a script. My favorite pharmacist there has supported my writing since 2016 when I wrote a blog about a lovely conversation she and I had. She subscribed to my mailing list (Hi J!) and recently joined my book launch team. When J saw me at…
Continue ReadingSeptember 2022 Newsletter
Dear Friend, Last month, I told you I sent my final manuscript, “my really, really, REALLY final manuscript” to my publisher. Then a couple of weeks later, I woke in the middle of the night wondering if an important paragraph I had moved had made it back into the final manuscript. It hadn’t. I knew this…
Continue ReadingAugust 2022 Newsletter
Dear Friend, I’ll make this short and sweet this month. I sent my final manuscript (my really, really, REALLY final) manuscript to my publisher a few days ago after five 16-hour days of revising. The week before, I attended my first writer’s conference–in Lancaster, PA–and met many virtual writing friends IRL. Any lingering imposter syndrome…
Continue ReadingJuly 2022 Newsletter
July 2022 NewsletterDear Friend, After every mass shooting, after each political bombshell, after horrific acts of nature or war, I practice gratitude. Some people have formal practices involving journaling or meditating. Mine is more of a gut reaction that I tune into at night. I get in bed and thank God (my higher power, not to assume…
Continue ReadingJune 2022 Newsletter
Dear Friend, It feels almost pointless to write about my memoir journey with the turbulence going on in this country and our world. But that is why you and I are here, so that’s what I’ll do. I hope this newsletter gives you a moment’s escape from bad news (although–full disclosure–I do talk about painful memories). With my…
Continue Reading