Are worry and anxiety the same thing?*
The afternoon my husband carried our newborn upstairs and laid him in his crib, I became a worrier. How much is too much worrying?
Continue ReadingSeptember 2021 Newsletter
Speaking of white flags, in July, I let go of people-pleasing as a primary theme of my memoir, with motherhood taking center stage. I’m still wending my way out of and into those literary worlds, trying to find my niche and my tribe.
Continue ReadingA 9-11 Prayer.
Looking around at the children’s innocent faces, I thought, “What kind of world are they growing up in?”
Continue ReadingMotherhood Lessons from an Empty Nest
I’m a slow learner of life sometimes, so the universe (or God, or a higher power) has no choice but to thwack me on the head with a spiritual 2X4 to make me pay attention. My biggest thwack was my son’s brain tumor.
Continue ReadingJuly 2021 Newsletter
My younger son says he remembers little of what happened, and I consider that a blessing. Somehow, we managed to insulate him from the trauma.
Continue ReadingFear of abandonment. What people-pleasers should know
Since I wrote last month about fear of conflict and anger—the main drivers of my (fading!) people-pleasing—I’ve been mulling over the fear of abandonment, curious if it also fits into my puzzle. Here’s what I learned.
Continue ReadingJune 2021 Newsletter
A friend recently sent me a picture of Matt, circa 1994. He was about eight–the age when everything started to fall apart. I can almost hear his goofy laugh, and it reminds me that we did have good times, we did have a special bond, he did feel loved. Sometimes in writing my memoir, I lose sight of that.
Continue ReadingMay 2021 Newsletter
Maybe my new grand-puppy should watch my new one-minute Hello video on my website. And what about you? If you and I have only met through the written word, here’s your chance to hear my voice and see me in (sitting down) action.
Continue ReadingFear and Anger and What Happens When They Intersect.
Anger has always been a tricky emotion for me. I feel it, and I know it’s normal and healthy, but I don’t always know what to do with it or how to express it in a constructive way. Centuries ago, Aristotle described me so well: “Anybody can become angry – that is easy, but to be angry with the right person and to the right degree and at the right time and for the right purpose, and in the right way–that is not within everybody’s power and is not easy.”
Continue ReadingCan people-pleasing be inherited?
Neither my mother nor my father would ever say a bad word about anyone. If they had nothing nice to say, they said nothing at all. It was an admirable trait, and my parents were formidable role models.
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